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IF I COULD LIVE TWICE

by Robert Newton

I thought that death would be the end
And up to Heaven my soul they’d send
Where I’d live––forever happy––on a cloud.
Apparently, that’s not the case
As I stare life right in the face
With the chance to live again I am endowed.

So rather than complainin’ I’ll make the most of what I’ve come to be
And do the things I had to leave undone
As soon as it stops rainin’ I will start again––just wait and see
And find my rightful place beneath the sun.

First I’ll go to Disney––then I’ll learn to drive
Tellin’ people everywhere it’s great to be alive
I’ll get a job, a girlfriend, and maybe my own place,

"Hey there, mister, why can’t you seem to look me in the face?"

In at 7-11, this fat guy starts to shout
Says my kind’s not wanted here as he promptly kicks me out
I say,
"Okay, I’m leaving and there is no need to yell,
But first, give me a Slurpee"

He said,
"Christ, what is that smell?!"

Oh well, I always thought it would be nice––
If I could live twice ... if I could live twice.
Oh well, I always thought it would be nice––
If I could live twice ... if I could live twice.

So rather than complainin’ I’ll make the most of what I’ve come to be
And do the things I had to leave undone
As soon as it stops rainin’ I will start again––just wait and see
And find my rightful place beneath the sun.

The food I eat does no good––it simply passes through me
And I’m avoided by the people who I’m sure, at one time, knew me
There’s a bunch of creepy crawlies that have nested in my head
To be honest with you, my friend, it’s a pisser being dead.
I’d much like to return to that quiet, grassy knoll
And crawl back into my peaceful and inexpensive hole
Yes, I think I’ll do it––for here, I cannot win
If I give you the shovel, will you kindly fill me in?

Oh well, I always thought it would be nice––
If I could live twice ... if I could live twice.
But now, my only friends are worms and mice––
You don’t wanna live twice, you don’t wanna live twice
From Hell, better follow my advice––
You don’t wanna live twice, I don’t wanna live twice.

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